Summer of 1969. The orientation was over and I was headed back to the dorm. I was a stranger and alone in that Illinois farm town, a displaced hippie from San Francisco. Peace, love and Jesus had been my life for some time now and I felt out of place here. I toted a big leather, fringed handbag that I’d made myself. I wore my combat boots under a long paisley skirt. My hair was long, my legs and armpits unshaven and I was a California flower child. But no flowers for me on this day.
It was a sticky hot July and I was anxious to get back to the air conditioning. A car pulled up as I walked along, “You want a ride?” I hesitated at first but I was from San Francisco where hitchhiking was my norm for transportation. I said, “Okay, thanks,” and got in. Big mistake.
As we drove toward the edge of town I said, “This isn’t the way to the dorm.” And I panicked. There were three of them and I was in the back seat. I quickly opened the door and tried desperately to get out. I scraped my boot and twisted my leg trying to escape. One of them grabbed me and pulled me back in. He threatened me and locked the door.
All I could see was corn fields. The car stopped. “Me first,” the cocky one in the front said. He exchanged seats with the guy in the back and raped me. Then the second one did the same. Frankly, the details are a blur. Then it was the third guy’s turn.
I could feel his hesitation. The other two got out of the car and I just started witnessing to the kid. I told him the Lord Jesus wouldn’t be too happy with him if he went through with this. I told him God loved him and had better things in mind for him. I told him enough about the Lord’s love and got him born again right there.
Without touching me, he yelled out to his friends that he was done. They got back in the car and he talked them into driving me back to town. The cocky one threatened to find me and kill me if I ever told. I had to go back to school there the very next month so I never told—I was too scared. The nightmares came but I eventually healed.
When I look back, I wonder how I had the nerve to talk to a rapist about my Lord Jesus. But it just happened and that night changed his life for ever. Fortunately for me, I didn’t get pregnant or have health or mental issues as a result of the rape. I was just thankful to be alive.
But the most amazing thing to me was that in the midst of this terrifying situation I got this young man born again. It was my fault for getting into the car, but it was the mercy and love of God that got me out and brought another lost soul with me to the Lord Jesus Christ.
And if any of you three ever read this, I forgive you.
Love, Carolyn
I just read in Ecclesiastes about how even the secret things get revealed: “a bird of the air shall carry the voice and that which hath wings shall tell the matter.” My book is called WINGS. It reveals the secret things God wants us to know to live a more victorious spiritual life. Use it as a devotional workbook or just enjoy reading the true life stories that call to your heart.
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